I turned to the Internet to see if somebody had the same very specific problem several years ago and posted about it on Reddit. And someone did! Actually, many people did. It seems like squeaky boots ...

It was like that "squeaky boots" episode of SpongeBob SquarePants ... (The Wellies in question, by the way, are the classic Hunter Rain Boots—a full review is to come soon.) There was no way I could ...